3 weeks after we sadly said are goodbyes im sat here still feeling lost an wondering what to do now.I know i aint the only one who is missing you but mother i so do wish you were here right now.You were a big part of all are lives even if some of us dont want to think that but you were,even me i didnt think id feel like this but i do an iv no idea what to do or how to deal with loosing you,i just shut off from everyone an my feelings,well theyv gone mum,everything went the day u died,i lost me,a huge piece of me an i dont no how to get it back.I wear the locket i gave you that i got back after you went an i dont take it off,iv not even cryed for you yet,iv not even deleted your telephone number of my fone either,dont no why but i want to keep them for a while.I havent lost you cos i cant think that yet,i just keep thinking ill ring you soon or go up an see you but you wont be there will you,cos youv gone,gone forever,at least i told you i loved you an you said the same to me which gave me a warm feeling inside when you said that,but i wish i could av been there for you,i suppose thats wats really hurting me inside aswell is that i was the only one that couldnt be there for you to see you an to help you,god i love you mum an dont forget that.If you saw me now you would go mad but like i said before mum,i feel nothing,cold as ice now your gone.I wish i could be there with you i so do wish that at this moment,cos i miss you loads an its too painful for me to face.